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From the “This Could Only Happen in Quebec” File

November 19, 2010

Door-to-door salesmen have become a scourge on our society. It’s not only the concept that if I wanted it, I’d go to the store and buy it; but going door-to-door has become a venue for scammers and other crooked people to commit wrongs on innocent yet naive people.

Here in the Greater Toronto Area, Canada’s most populated region, the shifty door-to-door salesmen are pushing water heaters, gas and electricity services and other monthly bill services that are over-priced and under-serviced. Oh, but in Quebec, Canada’s unemployed, basement-dwelling, ne’er-do-well eldest son, door-to-door salesmen have been peddling black market cheese.

In the news this morning, this story appeared. A person had been going door-to-door in Trois Rivieres and Drummondville selling cheese that has not been produced in government approved facilities.

You see, the Quebecois take their cheese very seriously. They were after all, the people who put cheese on french fries with gravy.

“‘ey Pierre! You know, dees french fries, c’est bon but, dey missing something. I put some gravy but you know, how do you say, is still not right. ‘and me some cheese. I got an idea.”

And thus poutine was born.

So far, no cheese-related illnesses have been reported in the two areas visited by the door-to-door cheeseman but the government has issued a warning to people telling them not to buy cheese that hasn’t been produced in authorized cheese production facilities.

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8 Comments leave one →
  1. November 19, 2010 2:56 pm

    Door to door sales is just plain cheezy.

    Sorry, I just had to.

    HAHAHAHA

  2. November 19, 2010 3:00 pm

    Wow. This sounds like an edible version of Paper Moon.

    okay

  3. November 19, 2010 3:45 pm

    I can’t even recall the last time I bought anything from a door-to-door salesman. 1992 maybe? It’s been a while, and I can say I never will again. It’s just too risky. I’ll get one of those “no solicitors!” stickers for my door.

    my father once bought art from a dtd salesman. Another couple of times, he bought steaks.

  4. Riot Kitty permalink
    November 19, 2010 5:10 pm

    Black market CHEESE? Now I’ve heard everything…

    I’m waiting for the black market eggs.

  5. November 19, 2010 7:31 pm

    i like poutine….have you heard of a restaurant in toronto that only sells poutine?

    of course you like poutine…

  6. November 19, 2010 9:24 pm

    Sacré bleu! Les Québecois sont complètement fou.

    oui… je pense

  7. November 21, 2010 1:44 am

    You know, I might appreciate some door-to-door cheese sales. That would rock.

    no

  8. November 21, 2010 10:09 pm

    Hmmmm if you buy cheese from someone at your door and you get sick….perhaps it’s your own fault….unless you’re elderly….

    why don’t the elderly hold any responsiblity?

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