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Christmas unWish list

December 22, 2011

With Christmas just a couple of days away, I’d like to make sure that I don’t get any unwanted gifts. So here I am posting a list of stuff I don’t, repeat DO NOT want to get for Christmas.

  • Soiled clothing – I have plenty of soiled clothing. I have more soiled clothing than I know what to do with. Please refrain from getting me more soiled clothing.
  • Peace on Earth – It’ll never happen. Stop wishing for it. You’re wasting your time with this whole peace thing.
  • Justin Bieber’s Christmas CD – Do I really need to explain why I don’t want it?
  • Chocolates and nuts – Why not just get me an envelope laced with anthrax powder while your at it?
  • 3D television – If want to see things in three dimensions, I’ll turn off the TV and experience real life. TV exists so as to provide escape from reality. Leave me alone and let me have my two dimensional fantasies.
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4 Comments leave one →
  1. Riot Kitty permalink
    December 22, 2011 3:24 pm

    I’m totally stealing this.

    this can be my Christmas present to you

  2. December 22, 2011 4:55 pm

    I just watched that hilarious Steve Martin skit on SNL! Your “peace on earth” reminded me of that, i’m still laughing! Vintage SNL…..not new!

    SNL hasn’t been watchable in years. Maybe twenty years.

  3. December 22, 2011 11:07 pm

    I love your philosophy on 3D TV. Preach, brother.

    I refuse to wear another pair of glasses just to watch television.

  4. December 25, 2011 2:37 pm

    I promise I won’t send you anything from your unwish list!

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