St. Valentine’s Gay
You know what. I think the people pushing for same-sex marriages should be co-opting St. Valentine’s Day. It makes the most sense.
St. Valentine is a saint (partly) because he performed marriages that the state did not allow. He performed Christian marriages. Not exactly same-sex marriages. But my point is consistent. In many places, same-sex marriages are not allowed.
So, take over St. Valentine’s Day. Have that big parade on February 14th. Make it mean something again. Well, other than what it currently means. (Here is my penis.)
But more importantly, take St. Valentine’s Day away from straight people. We don’t know what to do with it. Seriously, you been to Hallmark recently. They got these toy pigs in formal garb dancing at the push of a button. I’m sure that’s what St. Valentine had in mind when he became a martyr.