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Weekend Recap

March 19, 2012

Before I recap the weekend, let me just get this out of the way. I ate waa-aay too much this weekend.


The evening began at Starbucks. While I was in there being bored to death by idiots whom I am obligated to endure their idiocy, I was further baffled by a group of very ugly people. It’s not that I criticize people for being ugly. If you’re born ugly, you’re born ugly. Nothing you can do about that. But these people, it was like they made efforts to style and groom themselves so as to look as ugly as possible.

This one guy, he had the combination Justin Beiber and Flock of Seagulls hairstyle. This hair took time and effort and product to achieve that look. And it looked really spiffy with his generic death metal t-shirt and flashy blue jeans.

He was with a lady, a lady wearing low-cut pants that were way to tight. You familiar with the term ‘muffintop’ because this chick, dammit, she was a baker’s dozen of muffins. She was spilling over in all kinds of nasty ways. When she walked in, I saw her from behind. She was a train wreck. She was nasty to look at, but I couldn’t turn away. It was baffling. She wasn’t wearing a top. She was just wearing a bra. When she turned around, I saw what she was wearing. Her shirt was only in the front of her. It was a fucking bib!

This was the same Starbucks where I saw the Starbucks Douche. Maybe I need to avoid this Starbucks, or all Starbucks.

After coffee, I decided to push my luck and eat dinner at Kelsey’s. That restaurant is never good. I don’t know why I go back. Oh right, I remember now. Garlic cheese bread on giant pretzel bread.

Afterwards, Clash of the Titans was on Turner Classic. Yeah sure, I’ve got it on blu-ray, but I watched it on TV anyways. It’s different when you’re just flipping through the channels and you come across something cool like that.


After work, I went out for a bit. I went to Denny’s for lunch. Other than the pancakes, everything I ate was good for me: egg whites, turkey bacon and fruit.

Then I went to Ikea to walk around a bit. I’m thinking of replacing my bedroom furniture. Right now, all of my bedroom furniture is the set my parents’ had when they were first married. It’s very 1970s which doesn’t bother me although I do prefer a sleek modern design. It’s holding together rather nicely. It’s just that the wood fronts have so many nooks and crannies that cleaning the dust out takes forever. And the stuff is so big. I haven’t got a large space to work with and my bedroom only has two usable walls. I’ve got doors on the north wall and windows on the south wall. To use this furniture, I’ve got the tall cabinet on the east wall and the dresser on the west. That leaves my bed in the middle of the room. Who does that?

I’m not crazy about Ikea quality. It’s crap. But looking at the price points, it would cost me more to build the furniture myself. I figure, I could buy a malm like my brother has for 150 bucks. For me to build that on my own, just the cost of the hardware would be 150 bucks. Okay, if I built it myself, it would last a heck of a long time. Ikea stuff probably won’t last more than ten years. But I don’t think I need a dresser to last more than ten years right now.

After Ikea, I went to a Mexican restaurant for dinner. I had some fajitas and some chalupitas. Oh, and a XX lager.


I realized I’ve gotten old and mellowed. I’m not the same shit-disturber I used to be. A pair of Jehovah’s Witnesses knocked on my door. I had just lied down to take a nap when they knocked. I politely told them to go away and have a nice day. “Thanks but no thanks. You guys have a nice day.” A younger, less-controlled and contained version of me might have said something like “Get off my property you Christian tools! Why don’t you read a real book, instead of that book of lies called the Bible.”

It’s not that I’m against religion. Okay, maybe a couple select few religions I abhor, but for the most part, it’s all good. I just don’t like being disturbed during nap time. And more importantly, I don’t tell others how and when and whether or not to pray so I dislike when others do that to me.

After nap time, I started playing a new video game. This game is called Homefront. It’s a first person shooter. The storyline is based in the not-to-distant future. North Korea has risen in global power following the rise of Kim Jong-Un. After conquering the entirety of the Korean peninsula and much of the eastern Pacific rim, North Korea invaded the United States. The game begins during the Korean occupation. I control some pilot named Jacobs. I’m five or six levels into the game so far. I’ve been rescued from a Korean re-education facility by the resistance and have been fighting off Korean occupiers since then. Also, I’ve had to fight off a group of Americans who’ve given up trying to maintain civility and have become a bunch of kill-happy rednecks. I was willing to trade some wares for their helicopter but they weren’t willing to make a deal that didn’t involve the sexual exploitation of my female freedom fighter friend. So I had to steal their copter and kill a bunch of them in the process. Hey, I’m just trying to save America because America is the land of the free, not the land of the free to rape women because I haven’t seen a woman in six months.

It’s a pretty good game so far. Really, really dark subject matter. Five or six levels in, so far I’ve seen mass graves, people having bags on their heads then executed, insane rednecks survivalists and a gun battle in a White Castle.

For dinner on Sunday, I had a steak, half a loaf of potato bread and a half bottle of wine. Good wine. Expensive wine. It was a 2001 Sassicaia. Or maybe a 1999. Or 2000. I dunno. It’s somewhere around there. It was soo-ooo goo-ood.

Then I went to bed early. Steak, bread and wine will do that.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. March 19, 2012 1:02 pm

    I have to admit, that sounds like a really awesome weekend outside the train-wreck Starbucks Ugly Experience. And the wine sounds great too.

    It was a really good weekend. I had lots of fun, lots of naps, lots of food. It’s simple math.
    food + nap = fun^2

  2. March 19, 2012 6:17 pm

    I think I used to work with the chick you saw in Starbucks.

    Well I don’t want her around here. Take her back.

  3. March 19, 2012 10:01 pm

    a good weekend – except for that thing at Starbucks.

    the beauty of Ikea? it’s easy to clean and by definition cheaply unpretentious. it has a lifetime of about 5 years, which is about how long it takes for you to get tired of it. It’s easy to get rid of (craig’s list — college kids eat it up like IHOP Pancakes!). Took me a few hours/piece to assemble all of the bits in my bedroom (Malm). And i drank my way through it…

    Not college kids around here. Frickin’ spoiled brats.

  4. March 20, 2012 1:44 am

    You know it’s been a great time when there’s lots of sleep and lots of eats. :)

    Is it possible to put the dresser or the bed beneath the windows on the south wall? Or put the dresser and chest next to each other on the east wall and the bed on the west? Or maybe put the bed at an angle on the south/east corner?

    Old and mellowed isn’t so bad. Just think of yourself like a fine wine. :)

    I can’t put anything beneath the windows. They’re pretty low.

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